- I thought it was harmless that my daughter wanted to watch America's Got Talent. Then they brought out the male strippers. 1 month ago
- @JimGaffigan I witherspooned it one time. Got drunk and said, "Do you know how I am?" It was awesome. 2 months ago
- @JimGaffigan You're trending on Facebook due to "Hot Pockets." Somehow you knew they were nasty before everyone else in America. 6 months ago
Tag Archives: Kiefer
Kiefer is a sweet boy but when food or treats are involved, all bets are off. He shoves his mouth full and wants more, more, more as fast as he can get it. So imagine my surprise when he thought … Continue reading
Jacquelyn: Lots of words rhyme with cat. Cat, sat, rat, hat…wait. Cat. Sat, hat, mat, fat…rat! Kiefer: Jacq-a-wan, be quiet.
Kiefer to the neighbor as he pulled up his shirt: Wook! I got small boobies!
As we were passing many junk yards on our way to my brother’s house, I told the kids to look for Tow Mater from Disney’s Cars movie. They were getting antsy and hungry, so I thought a little game might … Continue reading
Me: You need to say something funny so I can write about it. Can you do that? Kiefer: Yeah, poo poo! And then he laughed his ass off.
Me: Did you have fun? Kiefer: Yeah, I have fun and cry. Me: You cried? Kiefer: Yeah… about you.
Kiefer is watching television! Just like that, the child has developed an attention span. He can also sit and listen to me read a short book. I thought this day would never come! The juxtaposition between my child with the … Continue reading
Kiefer: I wuz you, too, Jacq. I wuz you. I wike your shirt. **************** Me: You have school today. Kiefer: I not go to school. I too wittle. ************ Me: What did you do at school? Kiefer: I cry. I … Continue reading